The Fantasy Land
Thump! Thump! step by step we marched like soldiers up the steps. It was hard to see where we were walking because of the morning mist. as we marched higher and higher up the mountain, the fantasy land emerged out of the mountain because as we were walking the leave were fluttering like butterfly's and the trees were growing arms , legs and faces. Suddenly the steps turned into a carpet of multi-couloured flowers. When we reached the top of the mountain we could see: clouds looking like cotten candy the sky, the bushes resembled delicious lollypops and candy bars.
By: Shaurya
Mrs Fraser - you certainly used more WOW words in this piece of writing Shaurya. You painted a picture in my mind. I would like you to edit this and make sure sentences start with capital letters and see if you can change one or two "mountain" as you have used it three times in 100 words. I really like the sentence ...a carpet of multi-coloured flowers.
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